“Hi.”
Just that, in my DMs. From a guy I don’t know IRL and have
never had any public exchange of information or ideas with.
After a few attempts to follow up on this type of gambit, my
automatic reaction now is to disconnect from anyone who does this. Why?
Would you walk up to a complete stranger on the street or at
an event and just say “hi” and stand there? Really? Don’t you think your
audience would consider that creepster behavior?
If you want to engage with a new acquaintance, comment on
their posts in a way that’s thoughtful and genuine. That boosts their exposure
and shows that you are interested in what they have to say.
Good reasons to DM me would be if you want to ask for an
introduction to someone, introduce someone you think would be helpful or
interesting for me to know, share some thought-provoking content that you are pretty
sure I’ll be interested in, seek my advice, invite me to an event, or explore
the idea of collaboration. And you would only do any of these things if you had
already established a dialog in the public space of the platform.
“Hi” is just a random demand for my attention. You’re not
offering me any incentive to engage with you. You haven’t proven yourself
worthy of my time and attention in a public forum. You’re invading my day, and
it’s an unwelcome intrusion.
Odd that I’ve NEVER had a woman do this.
